Definitely not MY parents marriage

So I was in the local book store a few weeks ago looking for a gift for a dear friend, when the title of a book caught my eye - Not Your Parents' Marriage: Bold Parternship for a New Generation. I immediate grabbed it and read the back cover. "Hmm...interesting, I need to read this." So I buy it after finding a little something for my friend and it's been sitting on my kitchen counter ever since.

Funny that I saw it and there was only one copy available. I had been chastising myself for not being the SAHM I feel I should be. I'm horrible about keeping house (just ask anyone who has come over) and I share the duties of cooking and cleaning with my husband. I constantly feel bad about this, but I am at home, chasing after my two young children and would rather play and spend time with them than worry about the house all day. They are on opposite sleep schedules, so there are very few times when they are both asleep at the same time, except for at night.

I have tried to do some cleaning to no avail. The kids come in to help - i.e. climb in or on the dishwasher while I'm unloading it, take everything out of the cabinets as I'm putting them in, try to eat the cleaning sponge, etc. My husband, I do love this man, does not mind and is constantly coming home from work, immediately helping with the kids or the house. He says this is a partnership and that he enjoys helping me with the laundry, cooking and cleaning. He loves playing with and feeding the kids. In fact, he often kicks me out of the house to have coffee with the girls or just go for some solitary confinement, especially when I've had a rough day or two.

While I haven't read the book yet, I believe I will walk away from it feeling that our marriage isn't worse off because of the lack of traditional male/female roles, but rather stronger because of that. Certainly, I'm not saying that those in traditional marriages are not as fulfilled as we are, only that it wouldn't work for us.

My parents barely talk about anything of importance. My dad, I would never consider a family man, but rather one who enjoyed providing for his family in various ways. As a young child, it was through his work. He worked a lot. He gave 110% to his work and we came second. Then he gave his life to God, but instead of becoming closer with his family, he focused on his relationship with God (which is a WONDERFUL thing, don't get me wrong) through his work with our church. He then switched all his energies to Church, then work, then family.

My mom does not stand up to my dad or speak her feelings. She just does what is expected (this kind of reminds me of the opposite of Jane Eyre). I don't feel that as Christians, that is what God calls us to do. Yes, it does say that the husband is the spiritual leader of the family, but as such he should speak in love and do things for his wife. Do I feel that my parents have a horrible marriage? No. Would I want their marriage? Heck no.

All in all, I really look forward to reading this book. It is also a bible study, so I will be asking my husband to join me. It will be interesting and I'll fill you in on my thoughts after I've read it.